Life is just a series of tight spots.
It feels like we will make it out eventually. We think, "If this were different..." but the truth is...something is always askew.
It feels so unfair from our little corner of consciousness. I shouldn't have to be crammed in this car with these fighting kids for 8 hours. I deserve peace and quiet. I deserve romance and kindness and a thin body and more money and a nice easy time.
Why, at this point in human history have we not gotten it that life is hard and has sharp corners and stubbed toes and paper cuts and lengthy colds - not to mention AIDS and malaria and cancer. And winter. Why do we fight it?
I am reading the Divergent series right now. It's completely unrealistic - a 16 yr old girl saving humanity - she is constantly fuguring her way out of tight spots. It's not great literature. It's certainly not the speculative brilliance of Atwood, but it's a fun, quick read. And it's got me realizing - my life is pretty unrealistic too.
There are so many crazy, dramatic events happening that it almost feels fake. How can we be facing this work crisis while we also face this family crisis while we've been so sick? How can so many people I know have cancer at one time? How can so many be facing their marriages ending? That can't be! If I were a character in a novel I was reading I would say, "Yeah, right! She's got all of this happening?"
But that's just it. Life is absolutely ridiculous. And there is no right path that leads away from pain and chaos and into fields of gold.
So, here we are, driving out to our own chaos and absurdity. We are on this train we can't stop. And I can whine. I have been whining. Or I can just say, "This character, Heather, is in a tight spot! What will she do now?" And maybe, like when you're reading a book and you just know what they should do, I will listen to the reader. Or maybe I will drink heavily. Or maybe I will cry.
Or maybe all three.
Hopefully I can laugh. That silly Heather is always getting herself into these situations. That crazy Heather always turns to food and alcohol and friends. When will she get it together? When will she learn to be calm in the midst of it? When will she stop fighting?
Stay tuned to find out!